Lachrymation

I think we all cried a little bit more when we were babies. Or a lot more. But definitely more.

I mean, the first thing that we did as humans, after breathing, probably, was crying.

Crying was our only way of communicating.

We cried when were in pain, or shocked, or frightened, or bored, or hungry, or sad, or constipating, or uncomfortable, or sweating, or frustrated, or mad-- crying was basically our solution to most problems. It was how we took things; how we reacted and responded towards various situations.

As we grew older, the list became shorter. Much shorter. We learned how to cope, how to digest. We began to have less and less reasons to cry. You'd think feeling sad would be adults' final excuse for crying, but sometimes adults don't even cry anymore, not even when they're sad.

I think it's scary when we don't cry anymore. When we're deep in this black hole and our hearts are as heavy as the dark clouds yet our eyes... they are still. Lifeless and hopeless, almost.

Are tears a sign of life and hope then? A symbol of humanity? Did we have more life and hope in us when we were kids? Were we most human when we were babies? This has just got me thinking.

I have been told over and over again of what a strong person I am and what a brave soul I own that I no longer know what is the definition of being strong. I look in the mirror and I don't see shit.

Are we strong or are we keeping things inside? Or are those two things the same? Are people strong for keeping things inside for so long, or are people strong for confronting and overcoming their troubles and fears? I've passed by a week without a tear but surprisingly I do not feel strong.

Funny. I thought "not crying" IS "being strong".

So maybe "being strong" requires much more than just "not crying".

And maybe "being strong" is not something that happens in 7 days.