Struggle & Battle

I had disappointed my parents for more times than I could remember. I had been a failed daughter, a failed sister, a failed partner, a failed mother. Each time it happened I would try my best to pick myself up, not because I'm strong ('cause I'm not) but because I have no other choice. I would try my best to stop hating myself, stop looking at myself as a failure, and start doing things that could make me a better person and feel worthy again. I would try my best to do things right even though I know I had never and will never get anything 100% right - but I keep on doing what I have to because the world doesn't stop just because I do. Life is an endless journey of struggling to move forward and forgive yourself while looking back every now and then ensuring that you will never repeat the same mistakes ever again. Life is a neverending battle of trying to find that balance between making other people happy and making yourself happy and ensuring that your physical, mental, and emotional health are intact. It is not easy because it is not supposed to be, yet in the end of the day I would choose to say this:

Life is a gratitude list.